What’s with the name Songwind?
I just like the name, Songwind. Something about it speaks to me, to something I strive for. Again can’t say exactly why.
The name “Songwind” itself was taken from the form of the Hawkbrother names in the Valdemar books by Mercedes Lackey. It was the name of my scribe/mage in the MMORPG Ultima Online (Chessie Shard -though I have not played in years, those early years were great fun).
As a writer my various characters took on distinct personalities and backgrounds. Three of my characters were sisters separated for many years. Songwind, or Elissa, was the studious sister who seemed to be untouched by the chaos and grief around her, raised by elves (or elf like creatures) she never quite understood people’s reactions to each other. Unlike her older sister, whose scars were red and angry across her back, Songwind bore no outward scars for the world to understand her pain. Yet, she goes on, never considering giving up, confident in a future where she finds some peace and understanding. In all honesty, I’ve never been able to finish her story so I don’t know if she ever finds what she seeks.
In essence I think Songwind represents the part of me that appears unscathed by my history but in truth is deeply scared by it. Just because I never fell into the traps some abuse survivors have doesn’t mean I’m not mired by my scars. I suppose I am the cliché aspiring writer, trying to write away my pain, as transferring it my characters somehow exorcises the demons.
Somewhere along the way, I began to understand that my path to peace lies far off the beaten path.
The Beginning…
I’ve wanted to make this BLOG for a long time, and I’ve a few false starts. Hopefully, I’m ready to start and keep going this time.
Why?
Why not? I like to write and often by writing I learn. Learning is something I enjoy. Sharing ideas is also something I enjoy. Maybe, someone else will happen along and learn something along with me.
I’d like to believe I have something to contribute to the spiritual world. Maybe I do. Maybe I don’t. Here are my thoughts you decide.
My personal journey has been hard and painful; I have found the person I thought would love me no matter what, would not love me no matter what. Perhaps sometime I will go into that, but now is not the time.
Where to begin?
Some would say the beginning but even that can be subjective. Did my story begin when I was born? Or before, in another life? Did it begin when I first looked in a mirror and understood I was looking back? Or maybe it began when I began to question what I was told?
Hard to say, but whenever my journey began I am here now on a path with no map. My path crosses and runs parallel to the paths of others, so I am not without guidance, but to be true to the path I most make the decisions for myself. It is my journey and my path and I must follow it in my own way.
There are some in my life who feel my journey is nonsense. There have been times when I wished I could go back and change my path it is not easy to go it alone. I cannot unlearn what I have learned or un-see the things I have seen. Nor I do not truly want too, because for all my sorrows over the last few years, I am more at peace spiritually than I have ever been. It wouldn’t make a difference anyway, because in denying my spiritual identity I would always be incomplete.
What is my path called? Well, as I am the only one on it, it doesn’t really have a name. I’m quite fond of the term Kitchen Witch, though exactly why I can’t say.
